My Dad

Most of you that know me know that my dad is ill. He now refuses to go to the hospital. He says he is tired and would just rather stay home. At this point, I can't say that I blame him. Fortunately he is not in pain. He is down to 1/8 of a lung now and is extremely worn out. He feels like he isn't a man and is useless. Again, I can see his thinking on this. Though it is far from true. He has done his fair share of taking care of his family and being there in so many ways.

Lately he has been really saying silly things. A few days ago he advised us all that he would be making a list of rules that we have to go by. He rambled a bit about curfews and how to do this, that and the other. I think he thinks he is planning and it is his way of taking care of us even when he is gone. Of course, we go along with what he says mostly.

Typically me or one of my siblings sit with him while my mom gets out of the house. He told my mom just last night that he supposes she can go to bingo, but that us kids just don't know how to tend to him. And afterwards when she arrived home, he tells her that we didn't check on him at all. He realizes that he is lying. This is his good natured way of letting her know that he doesn't like her to leave, understands that she needs it at times, and that he is still the man of the house by "letting" her go.

My parents have their 49th wedding anniversary this Sunday. For years we have thought of having a huge 50th wedding anniversary party for them. I really am not sure he'll make it. According to his doctor he will not. Maybe we should have the party now instead of waiting. 49 years of marriage... that's so awesome. To be with the same person for that long, it's getting more and more rare. While I'm okay with relationships being shorter term, I find a wonderful beauty in such love and devotion.

He is losing his voice. It hurts for him to talk. He is losing a couple pounds a week. Those close to me know that he has been battling for a few years. He has been nicknamed the alien because he should have passed many times already and somehow pulled through.

So, I do realize my time with my dad is limited. I appreciate the rare funny comments and good days. While no one is perfect, I really am blessed to have such a good, decent, caring and wonderful dad.